I have a quiet house to myself for the next hour and a half and I am bored out of my ever loving mind. 

With Brooklyn at kindergarten, Kyan at preschool and Alex and Aiden sleeping, there is no one climbing on me, screaming at me, needing me or nudging me.  There are no cartoons blasting in the background, toys being fought over or dogs being pestered.  There is just me and the quiet.  One might think this would be an enjoyable break from the chaos, but honestly it’s kind of making me twitchy.

The fact of the matter is I’m not very good at being alone or having “down time” anymore.  In the 19 months since the twins were born I’ve been constantly spinning trying to get everyone taken care of and everything done.  I am never by myself until bed time and then I am too tired to do anything.  My arms and head have been full for so long that they have adjusted to a lifestyle of constant motion and now that things are slowing down are feeling the effects of withdrawal.

Sure there are things that could be done—when isn’t there laundry to wash or fold—but there is nothing that needs immediate attention.  The house is clean, dinner is made, the shopping is done.  I’ve even renewed the library books and written out some long over due thank you notes—two tasks that I am notoriously incapable of completing in my usual frenzied state. 

I guess the only thing left for me to do is get reacquainted with the peace—who knows, I might start to love it just in time for the baby to be born.